travel

It’s a Funny Sort of Feeling

it’s a funny sort of feeling
of longing for places 
you know you cannot return to
and even if you could
it wouldn’t be the same.

it’s a funny sort of feeling
to dream of a life you once had
one where every bit of you
almost
wished you were somewhere else 
(far away)
that you could start over again
and then you wake up and find that
you got your wish
and you are no happier

it’s a funny sort of feeling
wishing you could turn back time
relive part of your life
just so you could have what you used to but
you know you can’t
because Time has only one Master

it’s a funny sort of feeling
when you start to forget
and eventually all you have left of places you once knew like the back of your hand are
bits and pieces of sound and smell
fragments of faces and wisps of songs you used to listen to every day but now
now you can’t stand to anymore because all you hear is
everything you used to have

by Africameleon

By CulTuremiKs, ago

TCK Syndrome

There will be no trace
of me, here
after I have left
The colours of my paintings on the walls
are not stains
the laughter of the memories
won’t stay forever
and everything that ever made this 
space mine
is transportable

I knew enough when I came here 
to plan it this way

So you’re standing at the door
smiling for the hope of a future
but I
can feel the suitcase handle in my fingers
and I don’t remember myself 
anymore

Does that make me
a bad person?
If I have shuttered my mind
and heart and soul,
folded my memories away into dusty boxes
and stacked them in the back
of the attic, is that
weakness?

All I know is
you have never left
like how I have left
and you can’t understand – 
impermanence flows through
my veins as the very blood of my only hope
for survival

So I will smile and wave
at you in the doorway
and gather up my belongings
to carry myself away in

I can never return
because
nothing is ever the same again

by Ghanaperu

By CulTuremiKs, ago

Plane Ticket News

I’m going back.
Staring at the paper in my 
hands, all is dark around me except
this one fact.
I’m going back.

Did I choose this?
Do I want this?
My sister grins, wide and knowledgeable
as if this choice will define 
the joy of my future.
I don’t think I meant to choose this.
But how could she know? For her
it is home and light and safety, nothing
dark in her history.

In the dark of the evening, all
the memories return like shadows and ghosts
slamming through the walls around me
and I have nothing to say to them, so
my eyes are tightly shut as if that will help…
Am I going crazy?
Fighting against things that aren’t even here…

I’m going back. 
There is no choice now, not anymore. Only
the plane tickets in my hand
and the excitement of my friends
and the look in my sister’s eyes
when she tells me she is glad.

I think, I tell her carefully,
I think I’d rather die.

by Ghanaperu

By CulTuremiKs, ago

Eve Of Bittersweet

I’m leaving my bags packed
just in case I need to run away
but I won’t tell you that – it’s easier
if you never have to know
about impermanent.

The demons sound like prophets 
now, and I’m living out
every word they speak in slow
motion, suitcase handle in my fingers
like a lifeline to freedom.

Do you know what I mean
when I say I don’t want to 
be alone?

I have traveled before
and I am not afraid
of losing myself to it, I’m 
not afraid of drowning in it.
No, it is breathing that
takes all the work; staying
that is so hard for me.

I will tell you a secret.
Sometimes, the airplane seats
feel like home, and I don’t 
want to ever leave them, sometimes
you aren’t worth unpacking my 
bags for and I’m not sorry, sometimes
I think drowning
would be easier.

You’re yelling, yelling 
that my life is not my own
that there is a value on it
and I’m wasting the currency, 
my life is not my own and I must
keep my hands off it.

Do you know what I mean
when I say I don’t want to
be alone?

Except
I don’t say it.

by Ghanaperu

By CulTuremiKs, ago

Denizen (Distance)

by Hadassah Grace

It’s time to say goodbye again

Seems like everyone leaves and nobody stays
I’m such a mess and I feel out of place
Nowhere is home and I’ll never belong
I’m just passing through, and then I’ll move on

And I know it’s better to love and to lose and to hurt 
than to keep my distance

So take my hand, let’s run away
Tell me your story, I’ll share in your pain
Dive in the deep end, trust without fear
And we’ll make this time worth all the tears
Please don’t keep your distance

There’s not enough time to hide who you are
So show us your bruises, your burns and your scars 
And we will show you ours 
We don’t keep our distance

Take my hand, let’s run away
Tell me your story, I’ll share in your pain
Dive in the deep end, trust without fear
And we’ll make this time worth all the tears
There’s no room for shallow here 
Please don’t keep your distance

It’s time to say goodbye again

I stare out the airplane window 
A hundred memories come back 
Tears flood my eyes and I don’t hold them back
Each moment creates more distance between us 
But I’m glad I know while I was there I loved
With everything I had, I didn’t keep my distance, 
Didn’t take the easy way out, I didn’t keep my distance

Hello 
I’m sorry 
I might take things a little too fast
It’s just because I’ve learned that nothing lasts
Please don’t keep your distance
There’s not enough time 
Because everything changes, everything changes 
And I’m already thinking of goodbye 
Soon I’ll say goodbye again

And nowhere is home and I’ll never belong 
Nowhere is home and I’ll never belong
We love and we lose 
We always say goodbye
Nowhere is home, nowhere is home

Take my hand 
There’s no room for shallow here

By CulTuremiKs, ago

Bittersweet – An Original Song

by Hadassah Grace

Bittersweet

Wind in our hair, hearts in the sky
Salt on our tongues, sun in our eyes
As the ocean flies by 
And we’re young and free
And our love runs deep 
And our pain runs deep 
‘Cause we feel everything, everything

And we will 
Never have this moment again
We’ll never have this moment again

The sky is dark, then bursts with color 
All the sparks start off another circle in time 
And we look up at the lights
And we’re young and free
And our hope runs deep 
And our hurt runs deep 
‘Cause we feel everything, everything

And we will 
Never have this moment again 
We’ll never have this moment again

A piece of paper in your hand
A piece of paper in my hand
Different paths and different plans 
Can’t we just stop time
And hold on to this moment 
Like we’re holding on to each other?
Let’s forget just for a second life goes on 
‘Cause in this moment 
We’re young and free 
And the tears flow free

And it’s bittersweet

We feel everything 
And we will 
Never have this moment again

So close your eyes and take a picture with your mind 
Close your eyes and take a picture with your mind 
So you’ll remember what it’s like 
Right now 
We have everything, everything 
Everything, everything

More songs by Haddie Grace:
~ Denizen (Distance)
~ Gone
~ If The Day Is Over

By CulTuremiKs, ago

Gone – An Original Song About Leaving For College

by Hadassah Grace

Gone

I don’t usually ever act this way 
But they don’t know that 
Lately I just haven’t felt the same 
But they don’t know that 
They say this is freedom, spread your wings
You can be whoever you want to be
When nobody knows you 
Nobody knows me

I’ve gotten good at starting over 
But I’m tired of moving on 
And counting down the days til 
Everything is gonna change and 
Another part of me is gone

The other night I just fell apart 
And they all know that 
Lately I have had a heavy heart 
And they all know that 
They say it gets better, give it time 
But I’m running out and I feel like I 
Don’t even know me 
I don’t even know me

I’m tired of starting over 
I’m numb from moving on 
Packing up my things and 
seeing what the next place brings and 
Another part of me is gone

Soon I’ll be starting over 
And letting go and moving on 
So I am on my knees 
Praying that before I leave 
This place will feel like home

I’m packing up my things
You’ll always be a part of me 
Every time I leave 
I leave behind a part of me 
And 
Another part of me is gone

Follow Haddie on YouTube!

By CulTuremiKs, ago